Konbini Ossan Volume 1 Chapter 24 – Middle-aged Adventurer vs Middle-aged Adventurer
I turn my gaze toward the voice that sounded like it was jeering at me.
There, I see about five men. They all appear to be in their 30s to 40s. They have sturdy builds and are equipped with armor and swords.
Most likely, they are veteran adventurers.
Well then, we’re all middle-aged here. I’d like to get along, but I wonder if it’ll go smoothly.
“Oi, you. Switching careers to adventurer at your age?”
“Yes. I used to work in customer service, but due to certain circumstances, I was kicked out of the place I lived.
…
I finally made it to the royal capital in tears. I became an adventurer just to earn enough to survive.”
I explain my situation lightly. Just that much causes four of the five men — excluding the one who spoke — to grimace awkwardly.
They probably aren’t bad guys. They must’ve felt it would be wrong to tease someone with such a rough backstory.
However, the one guy bothering me shows no signs of remorse.
“Oi, oi! You think some scrawny, noodle-armed guy who used to work customer service can handle being an adventurer?
…
Tch — what a joke, huh? Being an adventurer ain’t some job you can do just by smiling and nodding, y’know?! Huh?!”
Seems he’s clearly annoyed about something. He glares at me, his voice tinged with anger.
I should play humble here.
“You are absolutely right, Senpai¹.”
“Huh? ...Senpai?”
The man looks confused at my unexpected response. Let’s keep going with this submissive tone and wrap him around my finger.
“Someone inexperienced like me would surely lose my life soon after becoming an adventurer.
…
Either become nutrients for grass roots in the wild, or food for beasts.
…
I truly appreciate your pointing out my lack of experience, even to someone like me.”
“Hmm? Well, yeah. I mean, I was just stating the obvious, that’s all...”
I successfully deflated his aggression. Let’s keep pushing this direction.
“But unless I work as an adventurer, a man of such questionable background like myself can’t even make it through the day.
…
Whether I die in the city or die in the wild—those were the only options left for me.”
“Damn… you’ve had it rough too, huh.”
Now he suddenly acts sympathetic. But that’s within my expectations. Actually, this works in my favor.
“However, I am fortunate. I’ve met such a wonderful senior.”
“Huh? You talkin’ about me?”
“Yes. In fact, I saw you bringing a monster corpse to the guild once.
…
I thought to myself, ‘What an amazing adventurer, to be able to defeat such a strong-looking creature.’ I was deeply impressed.”
“Oh yeah?! Bwahaha! That must’ve been that Gray Wolf I took down the other day! A beast like that is no match for me!”
The man puffs up with pride, completely taken in by the flattery. Of course, I had never actually seen him ever before.
But any veteran adventurer with a sword is bound to deliver monsters to the guild. It was a guess with a 100% success rate.
Watching such a dumb man get easily flattered and lied to, I genuinely feel glad that I’m not an idiot myself.
(E/N: 🤣)
“I would be honored to receive your guidance and mentorship since you're such a fine adventurer, Senpai.”
“Now that’s a humble attitude! But y’know, I don’t come cheap. If you fork over some decent coin, I might consider it.”
“Thank you. If the opportunity arises, I’ll be sure to ask.”
“Haha! That’s great! You’re gonna be a fine adventurer, I guarantee it!”
“Thank you very much.”
“Still, paying money just to get tutored? That’s a weird hobby, huh.”
“Knowledge and wisdom to see through things are a treasure for adventurers.
…
And among all the experienced seniors who possess such treasure, there’s no one more worthy of respect for a beginner like me.
…
Wanting to pay and learn from them is only natural.”
“Gahaha! You’ve got a way with words. I’m feeling good now!”
The man bursts into hearty laughter, seemingly in a great mood. It seems he hasn’t realized the true meaning of what I said.
He probably thinks I meant he is the wise senior worthy of respect.
But in reality, my words were no different from saying, “You’re so dumb you can’t even detect lies, so you’re not worth much.”
Well, he’s happy being flattered, and I’m satisfied toying with him. If both parties walk away feeling good, then this is the best possible outcome.
Still, I really hate stupidity.
When you’re dumb, you lose the ability to see through lies. That means you won’t even notice when you're deceived or ridiculed.
It’s a condition where you've lost even the minimum dignity of being a human. In other words, fools aren’t treated as people.
(E/N: Wow, Senpai is getting roasted left and right without fire!)
And since they're not people, I feel no guilt flattering or tricking them as I please. I don’t even feel like I’ve done anything wrong.
After that, I continued to flatter and handle the man appropriately.
Even though he’d been thoroughly mocked, he left in a great mood.
The female receptionists, who seemed to have picked up on my sarcasm, smiled slightly from time to time.
Yeah... idiots really are the worst. That’s what I truly think.
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E/N:
Finally, caught up to PettiConfetti!
Was Ossan too extreme in his views? I mean, he's somewhat correct, you have to be clever to live in any world. Well, "Karens and Kevins" are idiots too so…
Anyway, next chapter will be new! The WN is basically completed so I'll be releasing a chapter per day!
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