Konbini Ossan Volume 4 Chapter 11 — The Scumbag Episode
If I can’t run, then there’s only one thing left to do.
Erase Nanakamado’s affection itself.
If she comes to hate me, there’ll be no more stalking. Problem solved.
And as luck would have it, today I have just the story that would make any woman despise me.
Yes — the matter of several women misunderstanding me, believing I intend to marry them.
And on top of that, I’ve left all of them hanging with vague answers. If I confess this, she’ll surely lose interest.
“I’m afraid not, Nanakamado-san. I can’t have you stay by my side.”
“What? Why not?”
She looks shocked. Good. Let’s keep pushing this reality on her.
“The truth is, I already have plans to get married.”
“!”
“To four women, in fact. So, I can’t take you along.”
“I see.”
Her eyes widen — but she doesn’t look hurt. Something’s off.
“As expected of my beloved. You’ve already brought happiness to so many women!”
That’s… a surprisingly positive spin.
“I mean, I’m marrying all four. You’re fine with that?”
“Hmm? What do you mean?”
“I’m involved with four women at once, and you’re not one of them. Can you really accept that?”
“Of course. Your kindness can’t be contained by just one woman. Besides, I’m above them, am I not? There’s no reason for jealousy.”
“I… see.”
Above a wife? What does that even mean?
I don’t get it, but it seems she has no problem with it. At this point, reason won’t help. I’ll just have to accept Nanakamado as some kind of supernatural phenomenon.
Still, I can’t back down. I’ll hit her with an even worse story.
“But that’s not all. To tell the truth, I never even intended to marry any of them. It was all a misunderstanding. I somehow ended up with four women believing I proposed.”
“As expected! That just shows how irresistibly charming you are!”
“On top of that, I haven’t cleared up the misunderstanding. In other words, I’m practically deceiving them into marriage.”
“What are you saying! If it means marrying you, being deceived would be a blessing. Sometimes, lies are a form of kindness! You truly are wonderful, my beloved!”
I see.
No matter what I say, it’s useless.
I go speechless for a while, stunned, before finally sighing and muttering,
“Hm. I think I’ve finally come to understand what kind of person you are, Nanakamado-san.”
“I’m so happy, my beloved!”
Overcome with emotion, she throws herself into my arms.
In short, Nanakamado is a living phenomenon that unconditionally affirms everything about me.
If that’s the case, I can at least turn that trait to my advantage.
“Still, Nanakamado-san, I really can’t have you at my side.”
“W-why not?”
“Love.”
“Love?”
I say the word meaningfully. She immediately straightens up, listening intently. Time to improvise a nice-sounding excuse.
“Love takes many forms, expressed through actions. But being by someone’s side isn’t the only proof of love. You should know that best, Nanakamado-san.”
“Me?”
“Yes. If being beside someone were the only way to show love, then your time apart from me would mean you never loved me.”
“Ah!”
She gasps, as if struck by revelation. I nod solemnly — though, of course, it’s completely meaningless.
“And love burns brighter the more obstacles it faces. When distance or rivals are overcome, only then can love prove itself as something truly deep.”
“In other words, you want me to show my love in that way too?”
“I’m not telling you what to do. The choice is yours, Nanakamado-san.”
I end with a line that conveniently dodges all responsibility. Fortunately, my vague words and tone seem to have worked — she’s completely convinced.
“I understand! I’ll keep doing things just as before!”
“Yes, please do.”
That should mean she’ll stay at the palace and wait for me like before. Or so I thought-
“Starting today, as your one true beloved, I’ll continue watching over you from the shadows!”
Brilliant. She managed to twist it again.
Still, that’s better than having a stalker glued to my side.
Honestly, back in Japan, I never suffered any harm from her either. As long as I forget the fact that I’m constantly being watched, there’s no real problem.
Which means — mission accomplished. I’ve successfully repelled Nanakamado.
“Well then, Nanakamado-san, I have things to attend to.”
“Yes, my beloved. I’ll be watching over you from the shadows.”
And with that, I leave the area.
Nanakamado-san activates her skill «Super Acceleration» and vanishes in an instant, hiding herself somewhere. She’s already nowhere to be seen.
Ignoring the strange chill running down my spine, I return to the reception room.
——————
E/N:
Is she even a yandere anymore? No jealousy at all?? The delulu is strong with this one! Stay tuned!
——————
——————————
Check out my other translation -
——————————
Comments
I couldn't care less if he shags a 100 year old shota or whatever else manner of creature he comes in contact with, but unrequited love? That is something I find hard to stomach. No matter how delusional the patient is.
I know its all for laughs, but I still feel bad.
Thanks for reading!